So I was telling myself recently, "Don't forget to host the Carnival of Comedy on August 14th. Don't forget! All those other carnival hosts, they forget and post it late and stuff. But you, Blue Square, are going to be different. You're going to post it on time and everything."

Then one day, I looked at the calendar, and it said it was Thursday, August 10th. How absurd! Someone changed the calendar on me. Ridiculous, isn't it? Some people might say that my memory is bad, but that's just what they want me to think! Anyway. On to the carnival.

In the world of geometry, there are blue squares, purple circles, gray rectangles, and green triangles. I, of course, am the Blue Square. Deal with it, peon!

Ahem. Yes. Well. That's okay, because you still have a chance to be a purple circle, which rates in the humor-geometry-dimension-thingy as pretty funny. Then even if you're a gray rectangle, you're kinda, sorta funny! And if you're a green triangle -- well, I'm sorry, but you're just a green triangle, and all green triangles are entirely unfunny losers.

Here are the purple circles, in all of their royal, never-ending glory:

tommy at The Kag Report presents Troubling News In Equality Between Men and Women, something which I can personally relate to.

FIAR at Radioactive Liberty presents Hezbollah Rescue Workers Rush to Aid in Qana. Indeed.

Chrie Carlisle at The Dimmer Switch wants Beat the heat. Over the head. With a shovel.. Hey, I'm all for that. Can we loosen up on environmental regulations now?

Genie at The Inadvertent Gardener presents Saddam would have just asked to be shot, which actually has nothing to do with Saddam, but is okay because it involves something very anti-hippie. What, you ask? Go there and find out, ya triangle! Sheesh, do you expect me to do all the work for you?

El Capitan at Baboon Pirates presents Amazing War Photography!

Here are the gray rectangles, with their trademark ambiguity and two-lengthed anti-uniformity:

Vox Poplar & Ned Lamont at Vox Poplar Is Right About Everything & Don't You Forget It, Except For When the Blue Square Says Differently; Then Listen to Him! and No My Title Isn't Too Long, Thank You Very Much (or something similar to that) presents

Monica Bielanko presents The Kiss... And Not Rodin's...Oh So Far, Far Away From Rodin's posted at The Girl Who. The Girl Who what, I don't know. Go read the rest of her blog to find out. [profanity]

Dazd of Dazed and Confused From Here gives us Morning and Serenity [profanity]

Damian G. of Conservathink gives us Reuters withdraws doctored Lieberman photograph; pats self on back for strict editing guidelines.. He also gave us Rabid Girl Scouts to be Put Down Unless Vaccinated”, but I think that was supposed to be in last week's Comedy but wasn't. Hmm; upon perusing last week's Comedy, it looks like he did this to us last week as well. Those posts were, in fact, funny, but now he's become a gray rectangle for submitting twice after submitting twice the last time. UPDATE: OK, so it's not technically against the rules to submit twice, but I don't think you should.

Jeffrey of Hello Kitty Hell gives us "Hello Kitty Ferrarri". I just feel for this guy; I'm not sure why.

Alex at Have Passport, Will Travel presents Red Arrows V Red Barrows

Here are the sad, misfortunate green triangles, all puke-colorey and 3-pointed and such:

Amused and Bemused of American Inventor Spot gives us 10 Way to Freak Out Your Date, except there are only five of them, and the first phrase that comes to my mind is not "teh funny," but more like "the most disturbing . . ." But hey! If you like that kind of thing, go for it. And you know what? They also submitted this using a different form, too. Bah... so confusing. So inefficient. So un-blue-square-like. Stupid green triangles. [NSFW]

Garoth Thorp at Forest Of Thought presents A Curious Experience Concerning A Crappy OS, which I think would better fit in a Geek's Rants Carnival or something like that. Not that whining about Windows or whatever OS you want is wrong mind you; it's just that this submission wasn't very, heh, user-friendly, IMHO. (OS means Operating System, and IMHO means "in my humble opinion." ;) )

Hmm... I started out this Carnival upset because I had forgotten about doing it until the wee hours of the day I was supposed to, but after going through it all, the circular, the rectangular, and, yes, even the triangular, I'm happy that I did it, and I would like to do it again some time. If you were one of the unfortunate ones who was not treated so well in this comedy, 1) Get a life; 2) I mean nothing by it; 3)You probably deserved it, at least a little; and 4) Host your own week! Thanks to spacemonkey for letting me host, and thanks, of course, to IMAO for getting this Carnival started and for giving me a good enough reason to update my blog.

If you'd like to host next week, e-mail spacemonkey@imao.us and he should get around to you, hopefully he'll get right on it.

To submit a post of your own and see whether or not you're a circle, a rectangle, or a triangle (although the other hosts might have different names for you), go here or here.